How to Know When to Let Go

Categories: Depression and Anger,Fear and Doubt,Forgiveness,Peace of Mind

A pursuit at holding onto something or someone you’re afraid of losing. Endeavors to attempt to regain something or someone you’ve lost. Efforts at trying to obtain something or someone you’ve never had but desire. These are all areas wherein the question that arises, after a long quest of trying, is: when is it time to let go? This may sound a little pessimistic to some, but one thing I hope you’ll appreciate is that God loves you too much to leave you on what may be a dead end road. So, hang in here with me the rest of the way, and may God open the eyes of your heart to be enlightened by His illumination of the blessings He has stored up for you. As hard as it is to let something or someone go, when it comes to what God has waiting to give you, once your hands are free, and though you may not be able to fathom it now, it will result in being the greatest thing you’ve ever done.

It can be common to feel overwhelmed, desperate, anxious, and irritable because what you’ve longed for seems like it will never happen. It can zap your energy, enthusiasm, and self-esteem, making you want to throw in the towel on everything. But, I want to let you know that two things you should never give up on are LIFE and GOD! Despite what may not be working for you, God has something greater for you ahead both right here in the land of the living and for eternal life beyond.

We know that with God all things are possible, right? So, why even consider when it’s time to let something or someone go? Because, unfortunately in the realities of life filled with the invigorating and the disappointing, it is possible to have faith for the wrong things. Unfortunately, when this happens, and faith seems not to work like a person thinks it should, I’ve seen them give up on God. This is a tragedy, when it really wasn’t anything wrong with God, who He is and how He works. It’s simply a misunderstanding of who and how He operates in our lives.

It’s helpful to begin with knowing that God is a God of progress and of growth. He is a God that provides increase. What this means is that because we are created in His image and likeness, we too, are beings whose lives undergo a growth process for progress towards all we’re created to be. Every butterfly had to once let go of its caterpillar stage to increase its ability of movement with flight. The dragon fly lets go of what’s not working for him anymore by positively responding to the pressures of a shell that’s too small by breaking through it to free his increase. No, these transitions of letting go aren’t easy. Have you ever really looked into the process of a butterfly’s metamorphosis? Before it has any view of how its future will be, within the cocoon its essence is broken down into liquids to begin the process of becoming that butterfly. Yes, it’s painful to feel like letting go will break you down. But, it’s taking you towards an authentic essence of who you are, making and molding you, to prepare you for the beautiful outcome that’s in front of you! Beloved, whatever it is you’re holding onto, it may be a shell that’s too small. It may be a stage & season of your life that’s beneath the level you are suppose to be soaring at… if only you will let go.

Now, I’m intentionally saying, “it may be…”, so how do you truly know if it is time to let go? You can begin by checking to see if you and God are on the same page.

Match of Wills Prevents Stand Stills

First & foremost, like a child wanting a cigarette verse a frozen yogurt popsicle, what you desire to achieve and receive is affected by if it is in the Will of God for you. This is not to say that what is in the Will of God will be easy to obtain or maintain. As a matter of fact, that is so far from the truth because the enemy will oppose almost every move you make, attempting to block you from doing what God destined you to do. There’s a way, however, to determine whether or not what comes against you is God saying no. Or, if He’s saying yes and it’s the enemy trying to block you.

If somehow you ended up outside of The Father’s desires for you, you’ll notice He’s lovingly corrective. In addition to that correction, you will look back in hindsight, seeing that He has already previously given you several warnings before hand by informing you with needed knowledge to enable you to make the wisest decisions. In these cases, in which you are chasing what is not in God’s Will for you, you’ll find yourself noticing and accurately saying more often than not; “It’s not working.” In sincerely seeking His heart’s desire for you, if you’re noticing these things: Let Go. He has something better for you!

In contrast, when you’re faithfully following God’s design, the enemy uses things like slander, deceit, gossip, and manipulative trickery to hold you back from what you are pursuing. If you find this is the case, remember God is Sovereign and all powerful and never needs to fight dirty to get you to do what He wants you to do! So, HOLD ON TIGHT, IN FAITH! Whatever it is for you, that God wants you to do, DO NOT DROP THIS! The Lord is truthful. He will not tell you something then change His mind. And, as does a proud parent, He will often confirm the good steps you take in pursuing your endeavors.

Right Means to an End, End Rightly

Since He is a God of Righteousness, He will not approve of steps taken in deceit or underhandedness. As you walk with Him according to His leading, you will receive Divine assistance, from God and the Angels that do His bidding. In other words, He will guide you towards taking righteous actions towards what you are pursuing. And, He will keep you safe from harm, comfort you, and encourage you when the challenges from the enemy seem insurmountable. If you are considering or actually pursuing something using means that are against the Will of God, that opportunity is not for you: Let go.

Reasons Affects Seasons

Your “Why” is BIG! Intentions are important to God. Your right motives, motivates God. Your heartfelt desire to help others. Your sincerity that if the person had none of that external stuff, you’d still love, protect, & care for them because of the goodness within them. Intentions, that clearly say, “God, this for Your Glory and not mine.” These types of respectable motives will move God to begin to move His Hand of Favor over your situations, moving out the dividing tactics of the enemy.

James 4:3 tells us that when we ask God for something, there are times, “When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.” At times one’s personal desire is to be seen in a good light, to look good. To be perceived as prestigious, monetarily blessed, successful, or well liked. Sometimes, it’s to appease desires of what a parent wants for you instead of what God wants for you. God gave you a creative talent that spurs you to want to be a film producer, but they insisted you go to medical school and become a doctor. Or, you’re pursuing a relationship, not because a genuine love and appreciation exists for the nature of the person’s heart, but the money they may make, the recognition they achieve, or the connects they have could boost your status. Thus, the struggles and obstacles mount. In these cases, your motives calls for a personal reflection with God so you can begin to see yourself as He sees you, which is you’re; significant, talented, and complete in Him, therefore you need not seek it anywhere else but on the inside of you! So, Let go.

Non-Stop Rise to the Top

At times, in pursuit of things, we can make mistakes, and end up in very unsavory situations. Possibly, you had right intentions to enter into a partnership, but later realized it was a mistake. Maybe, an unfortunate occurrence happened because you forgot to consult with someone on your team or seek God’s thoughts on the situation, and you or others took actions, that produced undesirable results, without pertinent information. Or, you’ve survived the worst of a personal romantic encounter, but now know it was never supposed to be. Regardless of how the mishap happened, all is not lost. We serve a merciful God who can, and is faithful to, work good out of your mistakes! There only needs to be a willingness to let Him help you. Secondly, all the regret, guilt, or shame, only holds you back, and has no place once you give Him your ashes to allow Him to turn them into a crown of beauty, so hand them over to Him: Let go.

What I’m about to refer to next, I’m sure you have heard several times; let go of past hurts. There is never a good reason to hold on to them. As a matter of fact, the plans of God for your life, once you focus on them can help you to move forward in saying as Paul did in Philippians 3:13, “…I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead”. It’s easier said than done, as you still holding onto that anger towards those involved, and feel like your life will never recover. But that’s a lie from the pit! Let me tell you, beloved, thinking like that drains power from you and puts it right into the hands of the enemy. Understand, that when you yield to God, allowing Him to lead you, to heal you, to redeem you, no disappointments, no let downs, no mistakes can stop you or hold you down. You can still rise above the storm clouds that put a dreary overcast of your life in your eyes. Put down the desire to ruin someone else’s life because you think they ruined yours. Because that kind of pursuit is what would actually ruin your life. Trust that anything you’ve lost, God never made it a significant part of your future. It was in your life for a reason for a season. Then, you’ll begin to notice a relief come upon you as you: Let go and move forward.

Maybe this has helped you to confirm that you’re right on point, to hold on to all that is right for you. And, that is certainly my prayer for you. But, if you realize that you’re holding a part of your life in a cage, Let Go. Because you deserve the hopeful future that’s Divinely stored up waiting for you. You can start to align your will with Gods, letting go of anything opposite. Ensure the ways you achieve your desires have respectable means to an end, releasing methods that are actually holding you back. Secure your future with motives that motivates God to release blessings into your life, letting go of any that blocks blessings. And, remember when including God in your life, no matter what’s happened before, you can still ride with Him non-stop to the top, letting go of the past.

To evaluate a bit deeper, when you have more time to contemplate, here’s something to help you determine what or who you may need to Let Go. All questions may not apply to you, but the one or more that may, can begin to produce great breakthroughs for you!

  1. How does the endeavor or person you’re pursuing, or attempting to keep, fit into God’s Will for you?
  2. What are your motives for pursuing that goal or that person? Why do you want it/him/her?
  3. In your actions taken to achieve your desired outcome, how has each action encouraged, enhanced, nourished, and protected others involved?
  4. Without wishing for the restoration of what was good before the mistake or disappointment happened, how would you like to see your life improve from this point forward?

As you begin to prayerfully do this, being transparently honest with yourself and God, and Let Go of all that is unnecessary, I’m believing your latter days will be greater than your former!

 

Lukeisha H. CarrLove you with the Love of God!

Lukeisha Carr, BCACLC

Your Biblical Life Coach, Coaching you to Live Your Abundant Life in Christ!

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